so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
