she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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