it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
Randomize
