I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
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