He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
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