I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
It was confusing and full of hummus
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
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