you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
Randomize
