Texts From Last Night

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  (812): View more from Indiana

  Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.

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  (812): Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was. http://tfl.nu/nuhx
  Replies (28) Good night (8744) Bad night (837)
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  (954): View more from Florida

  I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.

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  (954): I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu. http://tfl.nu/e5ot
  Replies (9) Good night (3897) Bad night (851)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm

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  (440): One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm http://tfl.nu/xdgb
  Replies (16) Good night (5684) Bad night (693)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.

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  (508): My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that. http://tfl.nu/cfj7
  Replies (7) Good night (3452) Bad night (1173)
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  (913): View more from Kansas

  The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.

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  (913): The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight. http://tfl.nu/vdus
  Replies (1) Good night (1115) Bad night (2195)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.

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  (732): I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN. http://tfl.nu/e3sn
  Replies (18) Good night (7454) Bad night (1021)
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  (540): View more from Virginia

  I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.

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  (540): I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them. http://tfl.nu/t9kz
  Replies (6) Good night (1237) Bad night (2851)
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  (616): View more from Michigan

  you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality

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  (616): you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality http://tfl.nu/e7iy
  Replies (3) Good night (2406) Bad night (1123)
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo

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  (860): MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!! (860): I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo http://tfl.nu/vjys
  Replies (14) Good night (8528) Bad night (1080)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.

  (512): View more from Texas

  I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.

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  (512): I feel like someone had their period in my eyes. (512): I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night. http://tfl.nu/gefs
  Replies (8) Good night (662) Bad night (2091)
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  (779): View more from Illinois

  I smell like gasoline and adventure.

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  (779): I smell like gasoline and adventure. http://tfl.nu/rkdf
  Replies (18) Good night (2570) Bad night (721)
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  (813): View more from Florida

  I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.

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  (813): I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now. http://tfl.nu/w7s6
  Replies (4) Good night (1121) Bad night (489)
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  (989): View more from Michigan

  Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.

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  (989): Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning. http://tfl.nu/ngc6
  Replies (2) Good night (808) Bad night (388)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.

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  (617): Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good. http://tfl.nu/gr5l
  Replies (1) Good night (775) Bad night (389)
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  (862): View more from New Jersey

  This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.

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  (862): This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex. http://tfl.nu/wq13
  Replies (6) Good night (1344) Bad night (228)

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