p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Randomize
