A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
