As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize