I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize
