I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Randomize
