Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Randomize
