I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Randomize