Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
