Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
