i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
