Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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