You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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