did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Randomize