You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
