scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
Randomize
