You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
Randomize
