so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Randomize