Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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