Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
