why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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