Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Randomize
