Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Randomize