With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
