How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Randomize
