I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
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