she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
