There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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