But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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