i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Randomize