Taylor Swift is so right about you.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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