I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
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