You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
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I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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