she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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