They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
