I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
they're like a gay fantastic four
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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