she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
