Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
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