I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize