I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
