508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
