Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Randomize
