Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize
