I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Randomize
