Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
