Texts From Last Night

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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win

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  (484): i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win http://tfl.nu/5w0f
  Replies (2) Good night (3006) Bad night (506)
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  (916): View more from California

  I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here

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  (916): I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here http://tfl.nu/dn5f
  Replies (6) Good night (549) Bad night (2347)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.

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  (303): If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed. http://tfl.nu/n5xo
  Replies (9) Good night (3270) Bad night (763)
• Favorite

  (801): View more from Utah

  I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.

  (1-801): View more from Utah

  We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.

  (801): View more from Utah

  I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!

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  (801): I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high. (1-801): We could get him to build Inspector Gadget. (801): I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!! http://tfl.nu/5lpc
  Replies (31) Good night (7089) Bad night (762)
• Favorite

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  i just made my gag reflex go away.

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  (336): i just made my gag reflex go away. http://tfl.nu/haya
  Replies (47) Good night (7126) Bad night (719)
• Favorite

  (954): View more from Florida

  Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet

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  (954): Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet http://tfl.nu/1ehg
  Replies (14) Good night (814) Bad night (3088)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis

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  (603): it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis http://tfl.nu/b4c1
  Replies (18) Good night (1319) Bad night (2507)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night

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  (617): Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night http://tfl.nu/g4dq
  Replies (9) Good night (1362) Bad night (2520)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..

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  (585): you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink.. http://tfl.nu/9bld
  Replies (2) Good night (488) Bad night (1025)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.

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  (732): That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go. http://tfl.nu/exr6
  Replies (5) Good night (1504) Bad night (465)
• Favorite

  (702): View more from Nevada

  She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...

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  (702): She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her... http://tfl.nu/8w76
  Replies (6) Good night (497) Bad night (964)
• Favorite

  (571): View more from Virginia

  Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?

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  (571): Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not? http://tfl.nu/ae9g
  Replies (13) Good night (1505) Bad night (494)
• Favorite

  (925): View more from California

  she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat

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  (925): she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat http://tfl.nu/5es2
  Replies (6) Good night (615) Bad night (571)
• Favorite

  (+86): View more from China

  Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.

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  (+86): Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage. http://tfl.nu/0ehg
  Replies (5) Good night (901) Bad night (286)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.

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  (203): I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life. http://tfl.nu/5rhf
  Replies (2) Good night (469) Bad night (323)

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