Texts From Last Night

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  (573): View more from Missouri

  Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?

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  (573): Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night? http://tfl.nu/dwv8
  Replies (23) Good night (4712) Bad night (1278)
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  (217): View more from Illinois

  My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.

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  (217): My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you. http://tfl.nu/w1fj
  Replies (26) Good night (4943) Bad night (967)
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  (949): View more from California

  so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.

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  (949): so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home. http://tfl.nu/81x1
  Replies (37) Good night (5346) Bad night (817)
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."

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  (208): I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing." http://tfl.nu/1ant
  Replies (26) Good night (6360) Bad night (707)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.

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  (541): he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married. http://tfl.nu/sari
  Replies (27) Good night (797) Bad night (5316)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.

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  (973): he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade. http://tfl.nu/270g
  Replies (20) Good night (1524) Bad night (5512)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.

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  (503): I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too. http://tfl.nu/16uc
  Replies (23) Good night (7258) Bad night (1093)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase

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  (717): You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase http://tfl.nu/khjs
  Replies (3) Good night (1538) Bad night (641)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween

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  (403): I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween http://tfl.nu/vo8h
  Replies (4) Good night (2101) Bad night (580)
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  (269): View more from Michigan

  Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.

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  (269): Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done. http://tfl.nu/tz4a
  Replies (6) Good night (1106) Bad night (459)
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  (757): View more from Virginia

  Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.

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  (757): Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change. http://tfl.nu/iak2
  Replies (4) Good night (579) Bad night (364)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring

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  (201): hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring http://tfl.nu/45rz
  Replies (3) Good night (521) Bad night (347)
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  (928): View more from Arizona

  He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.

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  (928): He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart. http://tfl.nu/tciz
  Replies (4) Good night (1154) Bad night (236)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...

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  (330): Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat... http://tfl.nu/3sal
  Replies (1) Good night (570) Bad night (262)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face

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  (407): Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face http://tfl.nu/1rfc
  Replies (1) Good night (373) Bad night (540)

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